Think calm confidence meets nervous system flexibility.
This is the state where your vision feels clear, your presence is magnetic, and your actions are rooted – not reactive.
In a world of trauma-informed business and nervous system-led leadership, the term “ventral vagal” gets tossed around. A lot. But what does it actually mean? And why should you care?
Let’s break it down.
Understanding the Ventral Vagal State
The ventral vagal state is the most regulated part of your autonomic nervous system (which is part of the parasympathetic branch.) It’s what Dr. Stephen Porges, the creator of Polyvagal Theory, calls the “social engagement system.”
This state is marked by:
- Safety in the body
- The ability to connect authentically with others
- Clear thinking and decisions making
- Curiosity, creativity and communication
- Access to executive function and long-term vision
In short, when you’re in your ventral vagal state, you’re calm, collected, clear and connected.
You feel safe enough to receive – clients, visibility, money, support – and stable enough to take strategic action without spiraling into urgency, reactivity, or perfectionism.
How to Know if You’re In (or Out) of Ventral Vagal
When you’re in ventral vagal, you’ll likely feel:
- A sense of internal peace, even when things are uncertain
- Present in your body
- Playful, curious, open
- Grounded and optimistic about the future
When you’re slipping out of ventral vagal, you may notice:
- Your heart racing or shallow breathing
- A compulsive need to fix, do, or push
- Numbness, shutdown, or avoidance
- Looping thoughts and worst-case scenario planning
These signs aren’t failures. They’re invitations to come back home to your body.
Regulating Back Into Your Ventral Vagal Energy
Here are three simple tools to access your ventral vagal state:
Resonance Breathing
Inhale for 5-6 seconds, exhale for 5-6 seconds. Repeat for 3-12 minutes. This stimulates your vagus nerve and promotes calm (Make sure you’re breathing from your diaphragm.)
Social Co-Regulation
Call a friend. Sit with your pet. Listen to a calming voice (it can even be your own). Hug a loved one. Connection is a powerful regulator.
Orienting
Look around the room and name what you see: colors, textures, objects. This pulls your attention back to the present moment and out of the threat mode.
Nervous system regulation isn’t about being perfectly regulated all the time. It’s about recognizing when you’ve left your window of tolerance and learning how to gently come back.
Your Leadership Begins With Safety
If you’ve ever found yourself thinking, “I know what to do, I just can’t get myself to do it,” nervous system regulation is likely the missing piece.
You don’t need more strategy.
You need a body that feels safe enough to execute it.
This is why nervous system regulation is at the heart of all my offers. It’s not just about what you build. It’s about who you are while you’re building it.
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